Yes I am. That is part of my charm 😀

It was sometime in college when I realized I am crazy; we all are some kind of crazy. This notion of “normal” is some people attempting to control others into behaving the way they think they should.

Speaking of others and their arrogant attitudes, you can tell ultra conservative social police that hate the gays, hey, stop having gay babies. Last time I checked two men, or two women are unable to procreate.


Here’s what I think is normal human behavior. That everyone looks out for everyone else. That people who have plenty share with others that have less. That it is okay to disagree on matters large and small  – we can do that respectfully and still work together on other ideas, and that our beliefs should be subject to change at any time given good information that challenges our beliefs.

Whoa! What kind of crazy is that! 😀

So speaking about the crazy world we live in, how about the latest shootings in Connecticut? I am not surprised by this. Is it still shocking? Yes. That this kind of violence happens and has happened over and over in this country for the same simple reasons that are never discussed in a logical manner. First, gun control is an oxymoron. The frequent misquoting and misinterpretation of the 2nd amendment is in large part to blame. (No other country suffers the level of gun violence that exists in the USA, although Mexico is getting close, and where do most of their guns come from, yup, exactly.) Second, the level of undiagnosed people who suffer from some kind of significant mental condition is unknown because, third, the service and treatment of those diagnosed with any type of bad mental health condition is woefully inadequate.

I understand that people are going to react with a lot of emotion. It doesn’t help. Am I discounting their feelings? No. Is there significant pain and suffering occurring? Yes. That level of pain and suffering is beyond my ability to effect. All I can do is to have a plan if I am ever in that kind of situation, and I do. If I and a few others charge at a gunman, or gunmen, maybe 5 or 6 of us die instead of dozens dying and dozens more injured.

Even before these school shootings and other mass murders were making the news, I’ve had dreams of being attacked and fighting back. It’s never been what I would call bad dreams, just dreams where stuff goes down and I fight back. Just recently I fought and kicked a grizzly bear’s a$$ during a camping dream.

Someone attacking me and my school, or anywhere I would be would make me more angry than scared. How dare someone take another life. That MF’r needs to go down.

An oh by the way, I did some research, for the last couple of decades there have been on average 20 mass killings a year, with about 150 people dying as a result each year. That goes on top of the 15,000 people per year that die by gun murders. It’s tragic when many people die at one time, especially children, but even one person dying by another person’s action is tragic also.


I am a romantic. I am a dreamer. I am shameless in my belief that others will choose the good for the many over the good for just themselves.

Really, how hard is it? Look around, don’t ignore the weird kid. Talk to them. It might save someone’s life. It might save yours.

So the reason I am not surprised by bad things happening, really bad things happening is I understand there is a level of suck out there that exists beyond my comprehension. Don’t think too much about that last sentence. It means that I understand that I don’t understand.

My level of crazy talk just keeps getting better! 😀

People try to make sense of tragic events when there is no sense to be made. I cannot in my wildest imagination understand why someone would kill children.

When I was twenty, I had two other cousins that were 20 also. They died in separate accidents about 6 weeks apart. I don’t know if you’ve heard the expression that things happen in threes. After the second death, when I would go out the next couple of weeks my parents faces looked so stressed, and even though I would come home early, the stress on their faces was unbearable. For the next 6 or 7 months, other than school, I stopped going out.

That’s all I can do. I recognize life is not fair. I never expect it to be. I hope that it will be, but am prepared when it’s not. Was my parents’ fear for my safety unreasonable? I didn’t even discuss it with them. It was real to them, and I dealt with it.

That’s what I do 😀

I love that I love to laugh more than cry, although my tears are not far. I am too aware of the sufferings in the world and the pains, large and small, the people I care about suffer. But I choose to be positive and smile and look at each day as another opportunity to serve others.

Listening to the president talk about the killings today brought tears to my eyes 😥

I do love and appreciate the differences we have as people. I love the fact that some people get genuine joy in doing things for others. A couple of months ago I remember someone bringing chocolate chip pancakes early one morning as a treat for others. Some other people also brought stuff to go with the pancakes. It brought them such joy to share. I love those people 😀 (the pancake breakfast makers and the pancake eaters)


That’s why I am positive each day and smile. I know people that are kind and good, and care about other people. It gives me hope each day even though others would want me to think otherwise, I believe the world is a good place when people take the time to make and take tasty treats for others to eat.

Some days you have to create your own sunshine!


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