A friend asked recently how you recover from making a horrible decision.
You just do.
One thing that is certain about life, it goes on.
Sometimes we make horrible decisions because we base the decision on what turns out later to be false information. Sometimes we make emotional decisions, the worst kind. Sometimes we make decisions and not think through all the possibilities or we think the bad outcome(s) is (are) the least likely. Sometimes circumstances just change and our decisions, based on factors that no longer exist, make us look foolish.
Whatever the reason, you cannot beat yourself. You are a much better person than that. Pencils have erasers for a reason. We make mistakes, we are human, and we are fallible.
If others are so perfect, that they sit in judgment of a mistake you made, that’s on them. Let no one determine how you feel about yourself. You made a mistake, you’re sorry, please forgive; let’s move on.
It’s all about perspective. Time will heal all. Each day focus on the task(s) at hand. Get stuff done, move on. Each day that horrible decision will move farther and farther into your past, and always remember; never let something behind you trip you.
Again, use perspective. Whatever happened probably could have been worse. Be glad it wasn’t. Trust me, if you don’t think it could have been worse; tell me, I’ll tell you how it could have been worse.
No decision is ever undoable, good or bad. People are vigorously trying to overturn the Affordable Healthcare Act. That is something else to think about; passion goes both ways on a lot of important stuff.
The human spirit has an amazing ability to persevere. Forgive yourself, even if others don’t. It’s your life. Treat yourself well; think of yourself in the best possible terms. Bad decisions don’t make you a bad person. Again, we all from time to time, make mistakes. There is a lifetime of good things and good people to think about instead of a moment or moments of bad judgment.
That’s another thing. We are loved, flaws and all by our family and friends. We may or may not hear it from them, but love will always heal us and help us recovery from our own misdoings. (I don’t know if that’s a real word, but I like it!)
I can honestly say I have made a few horrible decisions. Ironically, or maybe not if you know me well enough, I made those decisions based on putting others needs ahead of mine. Those poor choices cost me physical and mental health setbacks.
When you’re out of the game; watching from the sideline, not doing others much good at that point. Something I need to keep reminding myself. No good deed goes unpunished.
Stay as mentally balanced as possible. Things are never as bad, or good, as they seem.
Sometimes you got to step back and take a look at the big picture. How does a moment, day, week, whatever fit into who you are, what you do normally, where your long term plans are in life. We all have times where for whatever reason we act, say, or do something out of our character.
We have no control about others feelings or opinions or attitudes. If we mess something up, sorry, please forgive, move on. We can never concern ourselves with someone or some people that can’t get over a mistake we made. Life is too short.
It’s like a savings account. I am hopeful most people live their life such that they add to the world. They create hope within others, they smile, say hello, treat people as you want to be treated. All that good stuff adds up. So if once in a while we subtract from all that goodness and make a bad decision once in a blue moon, the account is still full of goodness overall. One would hope so anyway, right 😀
Never be so hard on yourself that you think you should never make a mistake. Yes once in a while that mistake may be devastating in the moment. But again, have perspective.
There is never true failure, unless one chooses not to learn from a mistake. That’s really what the most horrible decisions boil down to, a mistake; an error. Hit the reset button and move on.
Life is good. Life is great. If you are reading this, you have at least one great friend!
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