I’ve said quite recently, just don’t. Don’t get naked, don’t have sex. Such an unattractive, messy, odor filled activity. Of course for the purposes of procreation, it’s the easiest method. No doctors. No consults. No specimens. No drug therapy to optimize organ functioning. In certain adult relationships, particularly new relationships, it’s a part of the process in determining compatibility. Sex definately has a role in a healthy relationship, but it is an area where men and women are the farthest apart in making their parts work in the most efficient and pleasurable manner possible. (I can imagine also in the case of same gender couples that what rings one person’s bell does not necessarily ring their partners bell by either the same method or resulting sensation.) However, bless those loving couples that attempt to achieve mutually satisfying orgasms in conjuction and coordination with their partners, and experiencing varying degrees of success in each attempt at those intimate encounters.
So don’t. Just don’t have sex. True that a strong healthy relationship also has a sexual element to it that positively enhances the overall bond between a couple, but more than likely, bad sex is one of the leading reasons so many relationships fail or are unsatisfying to one or both partners.
And I say it is the men, in heterosexual relationships, that must bear the brunt of those failures. Why do I know this? How can I say this with such absolute confindence?
Men readers of this blog post, if you’ve not or have never read a Cosmo don’t even go to the store and buy one. Head to you local library and find the magazine stacks where they have the last couple of years of Cosmo. You have A LOT of catching up to do. Another item you need to add to your reading list:
Chick flix will help to a certain degree give you a road map on how better to proceed in meeting your women’s needs, but romance novels will have much more play by play details in helping you figure out the frequency, the intensity, and the duration you should be using as guidelines on how to be the pilot, or co-pilot on the magic carpet ride you will be sharing with your partner.
God definitely applied a sense of humor when it came time to designing the most intimate parts of men and women and how they work 😀
To back up for a moment. I have two older sisters who read Cosmo religiously while I was growing up. When I was about 9-10 years old I started thumbing through the pages, looking at the pretty models, but soon the article titles caught my attention. Cosmo does not mince words when it comes to sex and it has a most decided female angle when detailing any topic. I learned the names, locations, and variations of lady parts that I would not be acquainted with until many years later. Also, Cosmo is excellent at detailing the physical variations on how a woman might respond to different techniques and settings.
My mother was and still is an avid reader of the romance novels and she had bookcases filled with them. Something that struck me at an early age was how in some stories intimate romantic encounters would go on for PAGES! In part the liaisons went on and on for pages because of the detail, but mostly it was because women need a much different approach and process to achieve and experience what their body and mind is designed to experience.
Final thoughts: don’t have sex, if you must, wear protection. Guys, 30 minutes minimum to start; if you’re done in less than an hour, you are not mentally ready to handle the responsiblity of this activity and need to address your conditioning.